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I'am a muslim, and I want to be married, so my problem is that
perhaps i'am *** (?!) I never paractice before, but i saw photos
and else, I WANT TO BE A TRUE MUSLIM, I WANT TO BE MARRIED
SO PLEASE HOW TO SOLVE MY PROBLEM !! I'am fraid that if I'll
be married my wife will discover it ? perhaps no !!!
As Salaam Alaikum
I'm confused..perhaps your wife will discover that "perhaps" your ***? You sound a bit confused perhaps it would be good that you figure out what your feelings are. Ask Allah to guide you through your confusion and to provide a path which is best for you. If marrying guards you from illegal sexual acts than this is a good thing. Your wife "discovering" that "perhaps" you have feelings that your not even sure about is not something that should scare you off from a legal islamic marriage.
ma salaam
Nzingha
Wa alleikoum Essalem wa Rahmatou Eleh wa Barakatouhou,
Dear brother, thank you very much for your "Nasiha" I read it
three times and it's exactly what i said to myself ...
But, as i said it i'am affraid to have troubles, bleive me it's
not very simple ! until today I do not do any practice, I mean
direct *** practice, because I know what Allah said about it, but
what make me in troubles is that I don't have any "attirance" to woman (?!) But I WANT TO DO A LOT OF EFFORTS by first to be married and In chaalah Allah help me and light me with in chaalah my wife in chaalah, Just that I want to be assured and
ready to do it, In chaalh ...
What do you think, objective ? Thanks a lot
Baraka Ellahou Fika.
Salem ...
/Muslim
As salaam Alaikum
Well I would like to have all the answers for you but I don't. Some things you'll have to figure out as you go along. It just may be after seeking the aid of Allah that you are blessed with a woman in your life that you are attracted to.. as a person.. as a mate.. as a partner in life. One who helps you and protects you in this diyn.. whom you fulfill your rights to and vice versa. And this attraction will be to the PERSON.. rather than to a whole gender. A person can be attracted to the female gender and still not have a sucessful marriage, still not have a good mate and so on. So there still could be alot of good to come of a marriage even though your not necessarily attracted to every woman that crosses your path. As with everything else in life you need to seek Allah's aid for only Allah can help you through this test. And we are all tested in different ways.. it is up to you to choose the path that is most pleasing to Allah and better for you soul.
Ma salaam
Nzingha
- Never do I argue with a man with a desire to hear him say what is wrong, or to expose him and win victory over him. Whenever I face an opponent in debate I silently pray - O Lord, help him so that truth may flow from his heart and on his tongue, and so that if truth is on my side, he may follow me; and if truth be on his side, I may follow him.
al-Imam Al-Shafi'i
As Salam Alaikum
Brother Muslim, your problem is curable. It is a psychological confusion brought about sometimes when there are hormone imbalances, stress or other causes.
I suggest that you pray to Allah to remove these thoughts from your mind. They are merely thoughts and removing them is not a problem. If you firmly put your trust in Allah, and pray to Him and rely on Him to remove these thoughts, InshaAllah, your prayer will be answered.
You can also try fasting to calm your mind and prevent it from thinking of these thoughts. Fasting has been recommended by Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and it was adopted by almost all the Prophets.
On a medical point of view, physical exercise can also work because exercise causes hormones to flow through the body like testosterone and endorphins, which may suppress or stop your wrong desires, as well as making the body adapt to what it was designed to do.
Another piece of advice, keep yourself busy and productive. Dont stay idle and allow unruly thoughts to start in your mind. If you remain busy and focused on daily tasks or in gaining knowledge, such wrong thoughts wont have a chance to enter your mind.
There are also a few special duas which I have seen on www.islam-qa.com , a "Salafi" site (but the duas are nice)
--------the following is copied from www.islam-qa.com-----------
With regard to making du'aa', Allaah answers those who call upon Him and are sincere in their du'aa'. If you say any of the following du'aa's:
Allaahumma tahhir qalbi (O Allaah, purify my heart);
Yaa Muqallib al-quloob, thabbit qalbi 'ala taa'atika (O Controller of the hearts, make my heart steadfast in obedience to You);
Allaahumma iqsim li min khashiyatika ma tahoolu bihi bayni wa bayna ma'siyatika (O Allaah, give me a share of fear of You which will intervene between me and sin);
Allaahumma inni as'aluka al-hudaa wa'l-tuqaa wa'l-'afaaf wa'l-ghinaa (O Allaah, I ask You for guidance, piety, chastity and independence);
Allaahumma Faatir al-samawaati wa'l-ard, 'Aalim al-ghaybi wa'l-shahaadah, laa ilaaha ill anta, Rabba kulli shay'in wa Maleekahu, a'oodhu bika min sharri nafsi wa min sharr il-Shaytaan wa sharakihi, wa an aqtarif 'ala nafsi soo'an aw ajurrahu 'ala muslimin (O Allaah, Creator of the heavens and the earth, Knower of the unseen and the seen, There is no god except You, Lord and Sovereign of all things. I seek refuge with You from the evil of my own self and from the evil and traps of the Shaytaan, and from committing any sin against my own self or bringing evil upon any Muslim)
- all of these are good du'aa's which were narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).
----------------------------------
May Allah guide you and assist you in curing your problem.
Sameer bin Nafees Al Arshad
Wa alleikoum Essalem wa Rahmatou Eleh wa Barakatouhou,
Thanks brothers (Nzingha & Arshad) for your helps and beleive me
you really encouraged me ang give me more strength ...
It was for me the first time that I talk about this subject, I
want to know if there is any book speaking about that ?
Arshad can you give me further infos about medical point of view, do you advice me to put some medicals ?
I want also, to know a point of view of a woman (SISTER) I want really to know what she thinks about that ?
Arshad thanks a lot for the URL site, I don't know about it before,
It's a very ISLAMIC HELPFULL MARJ'AA.
Thank also for Dua !
And this period of Ramadhan, was for me Elhamdou lileh a very BARAKA
period since I first begin by solving "this problem" and pray Allah to
help me, and of course have helps from brothers like you ...
Thanks brothers and Allah Baraka FIKOUMA
NB/ I decide to be married as soon as !
Salam
Muslim.
Assalamu alikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu !
Dear brother Muslim, it pleases us alot that we were in some way able to help you or comfort you. My advice to you would be to hold steadfast to Allah's religiom and pray to Him, the Almighty, to help you, and inshallah He shall.
BTW, Nzingha is a sister, and you have already received her advice.
Inshallah, maybe some other sister shall also advise you !
May Allah help you become a better Muslim and may He help you become one of His righteous slaves, ameen !
Fee Aman Allah !
As Salam Alaikum
MashaAllah, Alhamdulilah... Allahu Akbar. Its good to hear that you are controlling and your problem with Allah's help.
I wouldn't recommend taking medication for your problem. It is purely psychological, its all in your head. All ou haveto do is destroy these thoughts from your head and you'll be fine.
May Allah guide you further and bless you with happiness.
Fee Aman Allah
Sameer bin Nafees Al Arshad
Dear Brothers and Sister,
Baraka Ellahou Fikoum, Elhmdoulileh, Really Bi FADHLI ELLEH,
I'am Ligheted to the HUDA.
Oh Allah purify my heart, I seek refuge with You from the evil of my own self and from the evil and traps of the Shaytaan, and from committing any sin against my own self or bringing evil upon any Muslim. I ask You for guidance
Before to end i would like to thanks Nzingha (Sorry I don't know
that she is a sister) thanks a lot for Her NaSIHA, Thanks also
to other brothes (Arshad and Asif).
Barak Ellahou Fikoum, Wa kana fi Mizan Hasanatoukoum Inchaalah
Salam Elleikoum wa Rahmati Ellah wa Barakatouhou.
Your Brother, Fi Ellah, In chaalah, Muslim.
Assalamu alikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu !
We are very happy that we could help someone and help a person find the right path. This is what Muslim brotherhood is all about. This si the essence and beauty of Islam. Obeying Allah in helping our Muslim brothers and sisters, and asking Allah for them, what we desire for ourselves. Indeed practising homosexuality is a great sin, as Allah punished the nation of Lut for doing so. We must at this point of time note that being a homosexual is one thing and practising homosexuality another. The Ulama (scholars) have said that if one is homosexual and has all his life obeyed Allah, and never practised homosexuality, and tried to curb his desire towards people belonging to the same sex, so as to not indulge in sin, then he is just like any other obedient slave of Allah. However if that person listened to Shaytaan and practised homosexuality, then he has committed a major sin. He should immediately repent and ask Allah to forgive him, and thereon never indulge in such a sin again.
Daleel from Qur'an that Homosexuality is a major sin:
So when Our Commandment came, We turned (the towns of Sodom in Palestine) upside down, and rained on them stones of baked clay, in a well-arranged manner one after another; Marked from your Lord” [Hood 11:82-83].
“And they indeed sought to shame his guest (by asking to commit sodomy with them). So We blinded their eyes (saying), ‘Then taste you My Torment and My Warnings.’” [al-Qamar 54:37]
The Prophet (SAAW) said about the one who commits sodomy:
It was reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Kill the one who does it and the one to whom it is done.” (Reported by the four authors of Sunan. Its isnaad is saheeh. At-Tirmidhi said it is a hasan hadeeth).
But the one who repents truly from such a sin, then Allah shall accept his/her repentance, inshallah :
“And those who invoke not any other ilaah (god) along with Allaah, nor kill such person as Allaah has forbidden, except for just cause, nor commit illegal sexual intercourse and whoever does this shall receive the punishment. The torment will be doubled to him on the Day of Resurrection, and he will abide therein in disgrace; Except those who repent and believe (in Islamic Monotheism), and do righteous deeds; for those, Allaah will change their sins into good deeds, and Allaah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. And whosoever repents and does righteous good deeds; then verily, he repents towards Allaah with true repentance” [al-Furqaan 25:69-71].
Now,as far as the atheists are concerned, they are welcome here only if they show keen interest to learn about Islam, and go in accordance with the rules of the site, else they are unwelcome. There are some misguided fools in this world who do not believe in the existence of the Almighty Allah, and say they believe in science. This knowledge that they used for science has been granted by none other than Allah. It must also be noted that Islam has made great contributions in the field of science.I have posted some articles in the past on Allah's existence, in the " Articles and Reminder" forum. Also i have posted an article in the" Beginning Muslim " forum, which has verses from the Qur'an, where Allah mentions the atheists.
Once again i repeat my warning, all trouble makers shall be dealt with strictly, they are unwelcome here. Therefore please read the rules and regualtions of the site and go in accordance with them.
Fee Aman Allah !
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