Arshad
14-11-2000, 22:47
As Salam Alaikum
Bismillah Ar Rahman Ar Rahim
Adults often dismiss teenagers and leave them to be, seeing them as unruly, restless creatures. The say, "Let them enjoy their teenagehood, let them be free". Indeed, this sentiment isn't all that bad. But there is a slight fault in this approach.
You may think of teenagehood as a molten metal. It can be shaped in any shape, it can be easily manipulated and controlled. It is free to flow anywhere. This is why teenagers seem to change their personalities so quickly. These boistrous qualities are the same in every teenager, however 'mature' and 'grown-up' he or she may think himself or herself to be.
However, at the end of teenage hood and the beginning of adult life, the molten metal becomes solid and its shape cannot be changed as easily as it could have been before. Once a teenager becomes an adult, his personality is sealed, and remains the same.
The only way to change the shape of the metal is to melt it down to the molten state it was before, or hammer it consistently to the desired shape. Similarly, the only way to change the nature of an adult is to either start from scratch and build up a sound character, or to bend, twist, force and hammer the personality to a proper character.
This can be very emotionally painful. And it mostly happens to people who kept improper characteristics in their personalities at the end of teenagehood and at the onset of adulthood. Its what people usually call 'Reality Bites'. When everything blows up in your face and you are left bewildered and dismayed at what to do.
The solution? Learn it the hard way, which is the only way left at that particular time.
But, if the teenager had left teenagehood with a proper Islamic character, his or her personality would have dealt with calamity much differently.
Indeed, the believer would not despair and would remain steadfast and hopeful. Indeed, he or she will have full trust in Allah and what has been decreed by Him. Indeed, they believe that Allah is the best of planners and will get them out of dire straits in the most excellent of ways.
But if the teenager wasn't Islamic from the beginning, then in adulthood, it will be very difficult for him or her to have enough steadfastness and faith. Inevitably, their problems may as well multiply as they make drastic decisions.
When asked about when they wish to become Islamic, most teenagers nowadays say," Let me enjoy my teenage years, and then I will become Islamic". It is foolish to think this way.
You never know when the Day of Judgement will occur. Neither do you know when your own death will occur.
The human character will be very difficult to change once adulthood has started, due to the reasons I discussed above.
The teenager thinks that he/she is free to sin as long as he/she is young. However, in Islam it has been said that humans are held accountable for their actions from puberty.
So my advice to all teenagers is, become proper, righteous and smart people from today. Teenagehood builds the base upon which adult life will operate. So along with having fun and enjoying teenagehood, you must also build up the bases of your personalities, so that you do not suffer later on in life.
Having fun was never the only thing to do, and building a base was never the only thing to do either.
Islam encourages self-improvement and it is more easy to improve one's character in teenagehood. Use this unique time of your lives to your advantage.
Sameer bin Nafees Al Arshad
Bismillah Ar Rahman Ar Rahim
Adults often dismiss teenagers and leave them to be, seeing them as unruly, restless creatures. The say, "Let them enjoy their teenagehood, let them be free". Indeed, this sentiment isn't all that bad. But there is a slight fault in this approach.
You may think of teenagehood as a molten metal. It can be shaped in any shape, it can be easily manipulated and controlled. It is free to flow anywhere. This is why teenagers seem to change their personalities so quickly. These boistrous qualities are the same in every teenager, however 'mature' and 'grown-up' he or she may think himself or herself to be.
However, at the end of teenage hood and the beginning of adult life, the molten metal becomes solid and its shape cannot be changed as easily as it could have been before. Once a teenager becomes an adult, his personality is sealed, and remains the same.
The only way to change the shape of the metal is to melt it down to the molten state it was before, or hammer it consistently to the desired shape. Similarly, the only way to change the nature of an adult is to either start from scratch and build up a sound character, or to bend, twist, force and hammer the personality to a proper character.
This can be very emotionally painful. And it mostly happens to people who kept improper characteristics in their personalities at the end of teenagehood and at the onset of adulthood. Its what people usually call 'Reality Bites'. When everything blows up in your face and you are left bewildered and dismayed at what to do.
The solution? Learn it the hard way, which is the only way left at that particular time.
But, if the teenager had left teenagehood with a proper Islamic character, his or her personality would have dealt with calamity much differently.
Indeed, the believer would not despair and would remain steadfast and hopeful. Indeed, he or she will have full trust in Allah and what has been decreed by Him. Indeed, they believe that Allah is the best of planners and will get them out of dire straits in the most excellent of ways.
But if the teenager wasn't Islamic from the beginning, then in adulthood, it will be very difficult for him or her to have enough steadfastness and faith. Inevitably, their problems may as well multiply as they make drastic decisions.
When asked about when they wish to become Islamic, most teenagers nowadays say," Let me enjoy my teenage years, and then I will become Islamic". It is foolish to think this way.
You never know when the Day of Judgement will occur. Neither do you know when your own death will occur.
The human character will be very difficult to change once adulthood has started, due to the reasons I discussed above.
The teenager thinks that he/she is free to sin as long as he/she is young. However, in Islam it has been said that humans are held accountable for their actions from puberty.
So my advice to all teenagers is, become proper, righteous and smart people from today. Teenagehood builds the base upon which adult life will operate. So along with having fun and enjoying teenagehood, you must also build up the bases of your personalities, so that you do not suffer later on in life.
Having fun was never the only thing to do, and building a base was never the only thing to do either.
Islam encourages self-improvement and it is more easy to improve one's character in teenagehood. Use this unique time of your lives to your advantage.
Sameer bin Nafees Al Arshad